I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. The fitness industry, arguably the biggest market online, is a cesspool of shady marketers, scam artist, and self proclaimed “experts”.
And because this niche is so huge and involves a lot of emotions, it’s extremely profitable. It’s a marketers wet dream to be able to sell useless products and gadgets to the misinformed and ignorant.
As a fitness coach (and honest person) it pisses me off to see people scammed out of their hard earned cash and taken advantage of and I do my best to offer up legit advice and steer you in the right direction.
Like I said, the Internet is littered with useless fitness products and for every great product like the p90x or the TRX, there are dozens of terrible ones. Some are even so comical you have to wonder if it was even intended as a joke.
Hundreds of millions of dollars have been generated by the products below and in my opinion, aren’t worth 2 cents. Give me a jump rope, a set of dumbbells, and a medicine ball, and I’m good to go.
Here is a list of 15 ridiculous, and arguably worst, fitness products selling online right now:
1) The Shake Weight
This idiotic invention somehow made a name for itself through infomercials. If you can believe it, this device has earned more than $40 million in revenue (based on a 2010 statistic) and I’m sure is still selling well. Why? Good marketing.
As a trainer, I have to wonder how someone would think this is a good idea. And I guarantee that 90% of the people (mostly women) who bought this had never picked up a dumbbell before trying this for a “quick fix”.
I’m not sure how this got so many 5 star reviews on Amazon, but this one cracked me up and says it all.
2) Neckline Slimmer
Although clearly a product targeting women, this still deserves a mention. I have a better solution. Instead of using a spring loaded machine to jack hammer your double chin back up into your throat, try dropping your body fat from 37% to 22% and see what your neck looks like then!
3) Sauna Suits
Want to lose 10 pounds in 2 days? No problem. Just put a vinyl bag over your entire body and sweat all the much needed water out of your body.
People fail to remember that the goal is never weight loss, it’s fat loss. And unless you are a competitive fighter or wrestler who absolutely must cut weight for a specific timeline (still dangerous), there is no place for this piece of equipment.
Plus, all I really see is an overpriced Hefty bag.
4) 6 Second Abs
This is just one of those products that preys on lazy people who are always looking for a shortcut. We ALL know that getting 6 pack abs takes a shit ton of hard work and clean eating. Using something that looks like the top of a vacuum cleaner for 6 seconds is downright insanity.
7-Minute Abs are the way to go!!!
5) Sketchers Shape Ups
I mean hell, we all walk right? Why not get toned while we do?!? Oh yea, I forgot they don’t work and had lawsuits all over the place, but if a “celebrity” like Kim Kardashian advocates them, they must work, right?
And yes, these are made for men as well. See, it’s not just women that are suckers..
6) Dumbbell Silverware
7) Ab Rocket
The saddest thing is that this company has made millions of dollars on this useless piece of shit meaning that hundreds of thousands of men and women not only lost money, but had their hopes and dreams of having 6 pack abs smashed when they realized this didn’t work at all.
But it might make a good video game chair…
8) The Thigh Master
Oh yes I do. We have late night television to thank for the popularity of this. Damn you, QVC!
9) Leg Magic X
This bad boy must have been invented before that thing called walking. Not only is this highly useless but cumbersome as well! I guess a woman doing side lunges wouldn’t be very profitable although it would be more effective.
10) The i Gallop
Who in their right mind would buy this?
11) The Bounce Back Chair
This giant Johnny Jump Up can be yours for a small one time investment of $475. And if you make it through all 8 minutes of this video, you’ll get one of the best laughs you’ve had in a while.
And is it just me or do these two videos seem to be remarkably similar??
12) Face Trainer
I don’t have any words for this thing but according to its website, its a mask designed to provide resistance whilst doing facial exercises. I guess you never know when you’ll need a strong forehead..
12) Hand Fitness Trainer
Maybe just lift heavy things to increase hand strength?
Who knew that losing that stubborn belly fat could be as easy as wearing a belt? Well, millions of people thought so and sadly, are probably still buying gadgets like this in an attempt to take a shortcut to getting fit.
14) SpeedFit Mobile Treadmill
15) Kefty Portable Home Gym
Advertised as “the most versatile exerciser on Earth or in space”. Isn’t the term “portable home gym” an oxymoron? To be fair, it does appear to be somewhat relevant for a wheelchair bound individual, but that’s not how it’s being sold.
You may be asking yourself why so many pieces of shit make it to market and there is a simple answer: money.
Many of these companies aren’t all that interested in actually helping the consumer with their health and fitness, but rather in lining their own pockets with the cash from ignorant and desperate consumers.
As long as there are lazy people and good marketers, there will never be a shortage of products like these. I’m not happy about it either and all I can do is share the best information I possibly can with you.
So tell me, what’s your favorite useless piece of fitness equipment?